Between the sheets
by Twilightsavedme
Summary: I know our deal, and have for the past five months. We are secret meetings and hidden encounters. We are timed getaways at hotels with fake names. We are liars...we are cheaters...we are love between shadows...love between the sheets. Will Bella fight for what she wants or give him up forever? B x E baby
1. Chapter 1

Hi guys, I've been trying to gain enough courage to start this kind of story. Not sure where the story is going, or if they'll be more chapters, but here you go. I was reading a poem when I got the idea for this story. I forgot the name of the poem, but it may be obvious to someone as they are reading.

Thank you for taking a chance on this story! :)

Please review!

Disclaimer: These characters belong to Stephanie Meyers.

Confession #1: We are love between shadows

Dear diary,

He tempted me, and I let him. I didn't run from him because I am weak. He is my weakness, and I am his. All he did was touch my shoulder and my body reacted the way that it always has. I am his. He could smell my arousal; atleast that's what he had told me. He knows my body well, because I am his.

His lips touched mines with the softest lips. He was so gentle with his touch, yet desperate like I would disappear underneath his finger tips. He kissed me reverently with passion that held so much warmth. And like all of our encounters it left me craving more.

His fingers set my body on fire, I shuddered under them when he gripped me close. He didn't care if anyone saw us, it's me who is usually worried. Because this is wrong. How we feel about each other is wrong. It doesn't stop me from missing him.

I always miss him.

I close my diary, feeling helpless and alone. Its been hard being away from him. He knows where I am, and hasn't come. I know he won't come. New Years Eve spent in my dorm room alone, all because I couldn't stand the thought of being in the same room with him and his wife. No way I would be able to contain my tears.

I close my eyes and sit back and think about those amazing green eyes. I sigh in contentment, smiling as I imagine what our next meeting will be like.

He decides when we meet. He dictates our entire relationship.

But this is wrong. We are wrong. What we are doing is wrong.

He is a married man. He said vows that at the time he really meant, but ever since I showed up in his life it's made him question alot of things about his marriage. That's what he had told me.

He makes me feel young and stupid, but at the same time he makes me feel alive and free. But I'm not free. I'm in love with a married man.

I have to talk to someone about these feelings, but who?

I can't talk to Alice for obvious reasons. She can never know. Her older brother and I have a secret. We are a secret. We are forbidden. We are in love. She wouldn't understand.

I can talk to Angela, my other room mate. She'll know what to do. Hopefully she'll talk some sense into me. She figured out our little secret last month and instantly told me to knock it off, but I can't. I told her that. She understands. She has a love if her own, she gets it. That doesn't mean that she approves.

I dial her number and wait for her to pick up. "My Bella bitch, Happy New Year.", she's drunk.

"Happy New Year babe. I hope that you're not driving in your condition", I say in a reprimanding tone.

"No definitely not B. Ben's here, and he's totally sober", she slurs.

"Sure", I say through laughter. There's no use in talking to her. She's drunk, and won't remember the conversation. "Be safe Ange"

"I will boo, nighty night Bells", She says and I laugh again hanging up.

I sigh staring down at my phone wondering if I should call him. Its 12:30am, and I haven't so much as gotten a Happy New Year text from him. Why can't I just be mad at him? I want to be free, but freedom means that I'm without him. I can't live without him. Love won't allow it.

I will not cry though. It's a new year, and I promise myself a change. I am a twenty three year old woman, in love with a thirty five year old married man. Can I really promise myself change, when that's the very thing that will separate me from love. Love like I've never felt before. Love like rushing water, overpowering, overwhelming, all consuming love...

Love is selfish. Love makes me wait...

Ding.

Its a text. I look down and roll my eyes. It's from him.

Open the door. -E.

I furrow my eyebrows. Is he at my front door? A smile spreads across my face. Love is exciting.

I stand and slowly walk to the door, looking out of the peephole. I stare at his gorgeous face feeling my heart flutter. "I know you're there Bella", He says. Love knows. He always knows.

Opening the door, leaving one hand on it, we stare at each other. I probably look like shit, seeing that I wasn't expecting him.

He knows what I'm about to ask. I ask the question all the time. He's prepared. Love always is. "Where is she Edward"

"Who, Bella", He asks me even though he knows who I'm referring to. Who else would I ask about?

"Your fucking wife!", I all but yell. He takes a heated step towards me, and I take a step away from him. If he touches me the argument is over and he knows that. He pinches the bridge of his nose, licks his lips and takes another step forward, pushing his way into the house. He closes the door behind himself.

"I'm here with you", He says trying to get my mind off of the problem.

"Why?", I ask folding my arms over my chest, and I can visibly see him getting angry. "Why are you here?"

He takes another step towards me, but this one is threatening. "You know why the fuck I'm here Bella. I told you that I would be and I am", He puts a hand in his pocket, and sighs heavily. "Come here", He says softly, but I don't move. Love doesn't like being disobeyed. "Baby I'm trying-"

He starts but I cut him off. "-Don't call me that", I sneer at him. I heard him call his wife that.

I watch as he clenches his jaw. "Bella", He sighs. "I came here to be with you. I want to be with you.", I look down, feeling weak. "Please come here", I look up, and the look on his face makes me relent.

I take three steps until I am right in front of him. He doesn't touch me yet, but I know that its coming. We stare into each others eyes, and I feel our connection. He turns his head slightly craning his neck. "Be with me.", He whispers as his lips lightly brush my neck and I shiver, rolling my eyes into the back of my head. "I miss you", He whispers as he kisses my neck again. I can't take anymore. I reach up putting my hands into his hair, pulling his face to mines for a kiss. There's desperation in our kiss. There's unspoken words, there's a connection beyond anything I have ever know and it makes it hard to breathe.

I pull away from the kiss feeling his arms engulf around me. "I needed you", I whisper, and Love understands. We haven't seen each other in almost three weeks due to his traveling, and it's been hard with my college finals. I have really needed him.

He leans back looking into my eyes. "I know", He says pushing my hair out of my face. He pecks my lips once more before grabbing my hand pulling me to my bedroom. He sits on the bed pulling me to stand between his legs. He places his hands on my waist looking up into my eyes. "I promise that I-"

I interrupt him. "-No more promises", I shake my head not meeting his gaze.

"I promised that I would be here tonight with you and I am", He grips my hips pulling me closer. "Now be here with me. I need you"

"You don't need me!", I say and his eyebrows furrow. He has a wife at home who's willing to put out, yet he comes here. "You'll get your temporary fix and then go back home to your wife.", His face falls. "You don't need me Edward. You want me!", I say to him, and his hold on me becomes firmer as he rests his head against my stomach.

"I need you.", I hear the desperation in his voice, but I don't want to believe. He runs his hands down my legs, and slowly stands. His body touching every inch of mines with our close proximity. He stares down into my eyes, green into brown. I don't want to deny myself what is no doubt going to be a pleasurable experience, but I don't want to give in to him again. I don't want to be filled and loved, only to be left alone in bed when I wake up.

Then again, I don't want to live with regret. I want to live for the moment. I want to feel his long fingers play me like he plays his piano. I want to feel his toungue dance around my clit until I cum in intense pleasure. I want him to fill me so completely that our hearts beat together.

I understand, because I need him too. I always do.

He kisses me, and in that moment I could careless that he's married. His lips do that to me. I close my eyes and feel, connection, passion, desperate, lust, love. We pull at eachothers clothes, ripping and tugging til we are both naked, tongues swirling together battling for dominance.

We lay back on the bed and he sucks my nipples until they are both perky. I moan, gripping his head between my fingers. No matter where he touches my stomach clenches. My body is on fire. I feel his hands every where at once, and it's consuming me, making me wetter. "I'm going to fuck you so hard baby"

"Unghh", I manage to say through slight pants.

"I'll be gentle later", He says as he positions himself at my entrance, and I instantly notice theres no barrier. I'm too drunk on him to care. Words escape me as he plunges into me with so much force my head hits the headboard.

"Fuck yea baby...mmm", I moan out closing my eyes to enjoy.

"Look at me baby", He grunts out and my eyes pop open to look at him. He relentlessly pounds into me, showing me how much he has needed me. He places his hand on my clit and rubs furiously. I feel my orgasm coming already. "Shit!", He hisses as he thrusts upward hitting my g-spot.

"Oh god", I moan out as he places my legs together and slams into me. The sound of our skin slapping fills the room and it spurs Edward on, as his pace quickens. "Fuck me!", I all but shout. We fight through to our orgasm, I cum so hard it almost forces his dick out, but he doesn't stop. He continues thrusting into me. I see him close his eyes, coming closer to his orgasm.

"Bella... ahhh...Fuck!", He shoots his seed into me, releasing my legs. They fall back to the bed as he rests his head against my chest, still placed firmly between my legs completely spent. I run my fingers through his hair, and smile up at the ceiling, slowing down my heart.

After awhile I think he's sleep, but realize that he's not when he speaks. "I'm so sorry", He mumbles against my stomach. "I'm a fuck up, and you keep taking me back. It's not fair", He says. Love is never fair.

"You won't let me go", Not that I want him to.

He sighs, rolling over onto his back bringing me to lay in front of him. "I will never let you go", He says.

I want to believe him when he says things like that, but we both know how this ends. It's far from a happily ever after. "Baby", He says and my eyes snap to look at him. "Happy New Year"

I smile, because two months ago he said that today we would be laying in my bed cuddled up, and there was no place he'd rather be then with me on New Years Day.

"Happy New Years", I say with a big smile on my face. He kisses my shoulder.

Shortly after my eyes closed and my breathing began to even out I hear a phone ring. It's Edwards phone. I know who's calling.

"Hello", He answers groggily. I look back at my alarm clock to see that its three in the morning. I frown. She couldn't give us a few more hours. "I'm still on the plane", I look over to see him rubbing his eyes. "I missed that one and had to take another one Lauren",

The sound of her name makes my skin crawl. I hate her. She has Edward, she's married to him and is taking him for granted. She's a terrible wife and mother. What I would give to be thirteen years older so I could've met him sooner. I hear a heavy sigh and it stops my train of thought. "He should be sleep, Lauren.", Edward says and I roll my eyes. She doesn't even know how to take care of her seven year old son. "Tell him to go to bed.", He sighs, looks over at me with a silent apology. "Hey little man, it's time to go to bed", I smile. I think it's adorable the way that he talks to his son. "Well if you go to sleep now, when you wake up I'll be home", He says and I frown. He has a home, and it's not with me.

I know our deal, and have for the past five months. We are secret meetings and hidden encounters. We are timed getaways at hotels with fake names. We are liars...we are cheaters...we are love between shadows.

Thanks for reading, please review! :)


	2. Chapter 2

I don't know if I'll continue to have ideas for this story while in the process of finishing my other two stories. I'm enjoying writing this story so I hope I continue to get ideas. If I get enough positive feedback it should feed my motivation. I hope you enjoy. Please review. :)

Disclaimer: These characters belong to Stephanie Meyers

Bella Pov

Confession # 2: I'm lonely

Flasbacks before my closed eyes, they play out like a movie. Memories of us...memories we can never share, because we were never meant to be. If I hadn't met Alice, I would have never met him, and his marriage would be great.

He says that there's no way that I can know that, and that everything happens for a reason. We didn't meet by chance. We didn't fall in love by chance. We fell in love because we were made to love eachother. It was predestined.

Was I predestined to be this weak?

I am so weak, but I want to be strong. Strong enough to leave? Strong enough to utter the words, 'I'm too good for you'. Strong enough to not look back?

Is that really what I want? He'll ask me that question. I know us so well. He'll ask the question, I won't have an answer for him, and he'll leave. He'll make the choice for me if he thinks that's really what I want.

I close my diary once again, weeks after my last entry on New Years Day. He left, leaving me with a kiss that I will never forget. I haven't seen him since.

I close my eyes getting into flashback mode, better known as my happy place. I think back to one of our encounters at Alice's house for her birthday.

October 23, 2014

I close my eyes and try to catch my breath as I lean against the wall, momentarily in shock. His wife is here. Of course she's here. She's Alice's sister in law. I hold back tears trying to keep calm because what reason do I have for crying?

When I open my eyes, green eyes are staring back at me and I jump.

I didn't even hear foot steps approaching. He walks towards me slowly, every so often he looks at my lips. He slowly places his hands at my hips.

I stop all movement, and revil in the feeling of his hands on my body. He leans down to speak into my ear. "Stop running away from me.", I shake my head and push at his arms that have my hips in a death grip. He grinds his center into mines and hisses. "Do you feel how hard I am for you".He says in that lustfilled voice that makes me drip. I silently curse my body for responding to him so eagerly. So much need, so much desperation. I loose all self control. He lifts my dress, and with his eyes on my face, he pushes my panties aside, and shoves two fingers into my hot wet center. I moan.

He growls, removing his fingers. "Fuck...I have to have you", He whispers in my ear and I visibly shiver, panting heavily. I haven't been with him in a few days so my body is longing for his touch. He kisses my lips, my chin, my jaw, my neck, I hiss running my hands through his hair and down his back. He forcefully moves my panties to the side. He unfastens his belt, and pushes them slightly down. I pant in anticipation.

He leans down and kisses me before grabbing me by my thighs and lifting me. I wrap my legs around his waist, as he enters me with a deep thrust upward. My head lulls back hitting the wall with a thud. He fucks me hard and fast against that wall.

"Fuck", I try to whisper, not wanting the people on the other side of this wall to hear. I grip onto his hair as he leans his head to my shoulders muttering obscenities.

At any moment someone can round that corner and catch us in the act, but even with that knowledge we continue. We are only human with human desires, and my desire for him has never been more ablaze.

I'm heated with jealousy that I'm not supposed to feel, causing me to act primal. I almost mark him. He stops me from sinking my teeth into his shoulder with one word. "Bella", He groans.

He continues to fuck me, and I hold on to his shoulders shuddering as I cum. He's so close to his release, so I encourage him. "Cum for me baby", I whisper, and he growls lowly taking a strong hold of my hips as he fucks me. "Fuck me, yes...", I seductively say in his ear.

He stills. "Ahh", He reaches his release, putting his forhead to my shoulders, and releasing my thighs. My feet fall to the ground with the clink of my heels. He kisses my chest. "You look beautiful baby", He says as he steps away from me, fixing his clothes up as he looks me up and down.

Because I'm feeling bitter, even after a mind blowing quickie, I reply. "Did you tell your wife the same thing", I say as I look down not wanting to see the look on his face.

"Don't concern yourself with what I tell my wife, Isabella", He says causing me to look up at him as rage overtakes me. How dare you?

"Are you fucking kidding me, Edward", I shout and watch as his face turns dark. He takes a step to me and I stand up straighter suddenly feeling threatened. I don't back down though, or let him know that he is intimidating me. I hate being treated like an errant child.

He slowly raises his hand, running the back of his fingers across my cheek. "Bella, why can't you be understanding", His eyes squint shut as he holds a bemused facial expression.

"Understanding? You want me to be understanding", I take a step to him glaring at him.

"Yes, more understanding.", He puts a hand his pocket, turning his body as if it would help me to understand.

"Of what?", I say with a slight raise in my tone and he looks away, but I can see his face. He looks like a bewildered little boy. It breaks my heart. "Of what Edward", I say softer than before.

"Of us", He whispers. "This is all we have", He looks like he doesn't even know what he's saying. What does he even mean by that? Love is confused.

I stand back straight, not sure how to take his words. "Maybe this isn't all that I want. I want more out of our relationship",I almost fold my arms and stomp my feet.

With the same bewildered look, creased eyebrows, he looks around, running a hand down his chin. "More?", He scuffs.

"Yes, Edward. I want more. I deserve more", His head falls and I tilt my head down in attempt to catch his gaze.

"I can't offer you that right now Bella", He shakes his head with lowered eyebrows.

"Then let me go",I say without thinking. I want so much more from him. I want all of him.

"I can't", He whispers lowly each word filled with anguish. I tell him that he can, and he cuts me off. "Bella, I can't", He says a little louder.

"And why not", I ask him quickly.

"Because...", He starts, rubbing the back of his head. "Because every time that I see you. I can't help myself", He breathes the words out across my face, and I close my eyes inhaling his words, letting them touch deep inside of me. "I can't be without you"

After that day, I told myself that I would just enjoy what we have and live in the moment. Just being near him is enough.

Today is Edwards sons birthday. I told myself that I would be okay not seeing him today. He hasn't been in Seattle since New Years and having him so close without having him close enough will be hard, but I'm convinced that I'm just strong enough to do it. He is a parent first. I wouldn't come between that.

He did call me last night. He told me all of the dirty things that he wanted to do to me as soon as he can get his hands on me. I smile from ear to ear, letting his words caress my body, caress my mind. The flirty way in which he enunciated his words made me reach between my legs to pleasure myself. I listened as his words dripped with sex pushing me over the edge.

When our conversation was over I was spent. I laid there across my bed with a smile spread across my face hoping to see him soon. He never tells me when he can see me. Love doesn't want to disappoint.

Today was no different. He didn't say that he could see me later today after his son's birthday party. I have no reason to feel disappointed, except that that is exactly how I feel. Disappointed that he can have amazing phone sex with me last night, but then ignore me today.

I texted him 'goodmorning handsome', which he did not respond to. I asked how his sons birthday party was going, trying to be polite, and show interest in something other than his penis. I received no reply. At six his sons party should have been over. It's nine now, and still no reply.

I don't know rather to be worried or pissed. I decide to be pissed. I text him furiously.

No reply? How mature! -B

I smile down at my phone re-reading my text. Why wont you answer me? I miss you.

Ding. It's him.

Who is this? -E

Excuse me? My heart drops.

Did he change his number and not tell me? Should I ask Alice? I'm worried about him.

I dial her number quickly, not thinking straight. "Bells, I promise that I'll be home tomorrow.", She answers on the second ring.

"Hey Ali, do you think you can text me Edwards number", I ask her unsure if this is an okay thing to do.

"Yea sure Bells. Why do you need my brothers number", She asked in a high pitched tone, her voice full of skepticism. My eyes widen, feeling caught. I have to think of something, and quick.

"Edward mentioned me tutoring his son, so I was just getting his number so we can get started.", I say quickly, hoping that she doesn't catch my lie.

"Hmm?", She starts. "Had no idea Mason was struggling in school. Sure I'll text it when the party is over"

"So his party is still going on", I ask quickly. He's not ignoring me.

"Yea, Edward refused to start the party without Laurens parents there. They were running late, as usual. I'm surprised they even showed", she sighs and I don't know how to feel about what she said. "Well, I'll send you his number, and I'll see you tomorrow",

We say goodbye, I hang up quickly, sighing in relief that he's okay, and that he's not ignoring me. He's just really busy. I understand that. Love is understanding. I can be understanding.

Morning comes and I'm restless. Edward didn't show, he didn't call, and he didn't even text. So I didn't sleep. I waited until three in the morning, and finally fell asleep. Too bad it wasn't peaceful sleep.

I glared at my phone, telling myself that if he dare call I would give him a piece of my mind. I look at my alarm clock. Looks like I slept in. Its after 1.

Ding. I snatch my phone up. Angry, but hoping, only to be disappointed. It's not him.

Bells, are you coming out with us tonight? -Jake

Out where? -B

Out to this new club skye. Everyone is going to be there. -J

I rather do that then sit around waiting for Edward to possibly show.

When -B

When I get off. Just be ready. We'll come by -J

I decide to get up and get dressed before spending a quiet day reading a book. I told myself that I wasn't waiting at the house hoping Edward still showed. I told myself that I'd rather be alone. I'm obviously in denial.

I begin to read Jane Eyre, because I'm obsessed with the book, but my mind keeps wondering off to Edward. Why the hell hasn't he called?

Around five I get up to eat, hating the fact that once again I'm stuck in my apartment all alone. All of my friends have a life, and they are living theirs. My life is passing me by because I've become centered around pleasing one person. I've been anchored around all things Edward.

I'm near the end of the book by nine thirty pleased once again by how well written my favorite story is.

I yawn, closing my book, I get up and get dressed. My usual low cut red shirt with my black peacoat, black tights that make my ass look great, paired with wedge heel ankle boots. It's cold outside. Too cold to dress sexy?

Not that the weather will stop any other girls. I'm different though. I tell myself that I'm taken. I'm spoken for. I don't need to dress sexy because I have a guy that tells me that I'm beautiful. It's a lie, but it gives me an excuse not to try so hard.

At eleven my phone dings. I get excited, but then I hear a knock at the door. It can't be him.

He never knocks. I open the door and force a smile to my face. Its Jake.

"Bells!", He lifts me into a hug. "Where's Angela", He asks as he sets me back on my feet.

"Out with Ben", I answer him and watch his face scrunch up. "That guy?", He asks. "She's still dating him", He asks and I nod laughing at his facial expression. "I hoped that you had invited her"

I shake my head no. "I haven't spoken to her since yesterday.", I say and he nods.

"Welp you ready to go? The gang is in the car", He asks pointing a thumb back.

"Yea, just let me grab my phone", I turn and walk to the coffee table bending to grab my phone. I feel eyes on me. I roll my eyes. "Jake your eyes had better not be on my ass", I turn quickly to see him rubbing his hands together, looking everywhere but at me.

"You shouldn't wear such appealing clothes Bella. You're begging me to look at your ass", He says in a duh voice, blaming me. I wore this outfit thinking it was the least sexiest thing in my closet.

I roll my eyes again and walk out of my door, he follows. Ding. Its my phone again. I'll read it when I get in the car.

I lock up and walk to his car, hopping in quickly. I see Paul, Seth, Leah, and Emily stuffed in the back seat, so I sit passanger.

We listen to the music, passing around a joint on our way to the club. We wait in line for close to an hour just to pay our money.

We eventually get in and immediately I go to the bar with the ultimate goal of getting shitfaced. I toss back glass after glass, Jake buys me a shot, I even toss that back. I'm feeling the affects of my quick alcohol consumption. I talk to strangers, I dance around, I laugh, I cry, and I never leave the bar. Love is drunk.

I'm in the middle of finishing off a glass, and trying to swirl around in my chair with one foot when Jake approaches. "I'm taking you home Bella, you're drunk"

He reaches for me, I swat his hands. "I'm not fucking drunk", I giggle, slapping at his chest. "No, no, no Jacob Black! You are the one that is drunk mister",

"Okay, up you go", He helps me stand. I almost slip, but someone catches my other side. I look over and see Seth.

They carry me to the car, helping me in.

Ding.

I hear my phone, but I have no energy to reach for it. My stomach lurches. "Jake I'm gonna-", I say before emptying my stomach on the floor of his car.

"Oh no, Bella!", He touches the back of his head, looking where I threw up. "Are you okay"

I nod, because words fail me. I'm embarrassed.

We pull up to my apartment, he helps me out, helping me up the stairs. That's when I see him.

Edward.

He sees me too, and he does not look happy. "Edward?", I call to him. His face doesn't change.

"Bells, you know this guy",Jake ask me. Edward walks up to us.

"I'll take it from here, thank you", Edward reaches for me, but Jake doesn't quite release me, which amgers Edward more.

"I'm okay Jake. I'll see you later", I say and Jake nods his head, releasing me.

"Call me Bells.", He says as he leaves.

Awkward silence passing between Edward and I as I unlock the door, and fall out on my couch. I rest my heavy lids, only to be awaken by Edward. "Bella?", My eyes open. "You're drunk"

"Yes, thank you Captain obvious",I say as I sit up on the couch to look at him.

"Where were you tonight", He asks, and I frown. You're not allowed to ask me about my whereabouts.

"At a club", I answer shortly not quite able to relift my head.

"I have been texting you", He says and it pisses me off because I know that he hasn't. I've waited all day to hear from him.

"No you haven't", I say sharply.

"Check your phone", He says folding his arms. I find the strength to get up and grab the phone. Fuck he did text. He texted four times, and called twice.

"Okay, so you did call, but Edward...", I trail off. "Everything can't be on your time. I waited for you",

"Yes, and I'm sorry. I got held up", He says and I understand. I always do.

Then a thought crosses my mind. "Look at this", I show him my phone. "Did you send this"

Edward lppks at the text with simple words,'who is this', He looks uncontrollably angry. "Lauren sent this", Is all he says. "I didn't find my phone until this morning. She had it", He sneers.

"Does this mean that we are caught?", I ask him, worried about him and not myself. I ruined his life. His perfect family. He's going to loose everything because of me. Because I was impatient, and selfish.

My stomach lurches again. I get up quickly, running to the toilet. I throw up again, heaving. He holds my hair, because love is caring. He wets a wash cloth and kneels down to wipe my face. I stare into his eyes pouting. "Are we caught", I ask again with sad eyes. He kisses my forehead.

"No", He says as he stands, helping me to my feet. He grabs my face between his hands, causing me to look up at him. "We just need to be more careful." He says and I sigh inwardly, because when is love ever careful.

Thank you for reading please review :))))


	3. Chapter 3

Enjoy! :)

Oh and thank you for your reviews, you're awesome! :)

Disclaimer: These characters belong to Stephanie Meyers.

Edward POV

Bella.

The most beautiful woman that I have ever seen.

She holds me to this earth. She is my love, she is my light, my strength, she is my joy.

Whenever I'm with her -the woman of my dreams, the one that I'd like to call my wife- I am free.

Free to truly be myself.

Truth is, I haven't been myself in awhile. Bella helped me to get back to me. She taught me how to live again. Bella taught me how to love.

Living with someone that you're pretending to be in love with tends to shatter pieces of your heart, one by one.

Lauren.

She is the mother of my child. My Mason is the only great thing that came of us. I met Lauren eight years ago. She was my assistants best friend. She would come by the office to see Jessica, in short skirts, and shirts too small, and it was lust at first sight. To say that our sex life was amazing is an understatement. We were young, and driven by our desires.

We were never supposed to be longterm.

She became pregnant, and I felt that I had to do the right thing. Marriage was what she wanted. I was handsome, wealthy, and I come from a good family, that's all she needed to know.

We were never in love.

But according to my granfather, that's not a good enough reason to divorce.

My grandfather shuns divorce. He believes that God blesses a marriage and once vows are said, one should stick by them. One should stick by their word. Your word is your bond, he always says.

Disappointing him is not an option.

He wouldn't approve of me divorcing Lauren. He wouldn't be too thrilled if he knew that I was having an affair either. Yet here I am thinking that I've chosen the lesser of two evils. Trying to uphold my good name, my fresh face, my golden family. While having an illustrious love affair with a woman that I am so helpless in love with.

How sullied the Cullen name would be if I divorced. To make matters worst, she's a younger woman.

You can't help who you love.

I remember the day that I met Bella. My sister was bitching to me about never seeing her place. She'd mentioned that she was getting a new roommate, but I never expected to meet the love of my life.

August 25th, 2014

"You didn't bring me a present", she pouts, and I chuckle walking farther into the house.

"A present for what", I asked walking over to her couch.

"You never got me a housewarming present", She deadpans, and I smile thinking that she's kidding.

"You're kidding right Alice? You've been here two years", I ask her making myself comfortable on her couch.

"Yea, so what?",she comes bouncing towards me in her normal fashion. "You should meet my roommate. She's awesome. We're bestfriends already, don't tell Rose or Charlotte", she puts a finger in front of her mouth and laughs.

"Have you been drinking", I ask her skeptically.

"Why yes Edward I have! You should have some.", She says walking happily towards the kitchen.

I hold a hand out halting her. "I won't be staying lo-", I fail to finish my sentence when my eyes set on the most breathtaking woman.

She stares at me awkwardly with big brown eyes, and then she looks down nervously brushing a strand of hair out of her face. I'm stuck in place staring at this beautiful girl before me, and my heart begins to race.

"Bella, this is my brother Edward.", Alice introduces us from behind the kitchen wall, and I can't speak. I watch as Bella slowly looks up at me with a smile on her face.

"Nice to meet you Edward", She says sweetly, before walking towards me and holding out her hand. I look down at her hand then back to her face to see her biting her bottom lip nervously. My dick twitches in my pants. Her lips are so sexy. I imagine them wrapped around my cock.

I shake my head, trying to clear the thought. I reach out and shake her hand staring her in her eyes. "It's a pleasure meeting you", I say softly, and she looks away trying to remove her hand. I don't want to let her go. I don't want this tingle in my hand to stop, and I don't want my racing heart to calm. This is excitement, and it's something that I have been missing in my life.

I've been missing a lot in my marriage actually. I regret listening to my family. I regret letting them pressure me into marrying Lauren just because it was the right thing to do. I regret everything but Mason.

I wouldn't trade him for anything in the world. That kid is my pride and joy. He's such a bright kid, so full of life. I love Mason so much. He keeps me going.

That's the other reason that I haven't divorced Lauren. I don't want him to resent me like I resented my father. When I was ten I found out that my dad, Carlisle, was cheating on my mother, Elizabeth, with Alice's mom, Esme.

My dad divorced my mom, for Esme, and at the time I hated him for it, but later realized that he was alot happier with Esme. His father, my grandfather, to this day speak to Esme with disdain, almost in disgust. He still sees her as a home wrecker.

Adultery is something that he is strongly against.

That's why he can't know about Isabella. I love my grandfather dearly, but he is blinded my religion. He would never understand.

I look up to him. I would hate for him to address me any differently than he always has.

Which brings me to today. A very important meeting that will either make my grandfather extremely proud of me, or extremely upset with me.

According to him, I'm pigheaded, and that I don't think that I need anyone. He doesn't think that I am capable of a deal. Especially not with a guy that is my direct enemy.

I hate this guy, and I'm expected to work with him? I honestly can afford to just buy him out, but that's not in the best interest of my company. According to my grandfather that's not the look that I want. He kept this company's good standing for 45 years, and he wants it to remain that way under my control.

If it weren't for his health failing him, he'd still be running this company, and I would probably be Chief financial director at some fancy investment company.

"Mr. Cullen", I hear my name called and I snap out of my thoughts to see that I am still in a board meeting. "Miss Cullen is on the line for you", my assistant says before closing the door.

I look around the room to see that everyone is looking at me expectantly. I stand, hovering, ready to bark my orders. "It's a new year, and I expect growth." I look at each of them. "I want up to date numbers by the end of the day", And with that they can tell the meeting is over. None of them were prepared for today which is unacceptable.

I tap line 4 where my sister is holding. I pick up the phone.

"Alice", I say into the phone, taking my seat.

"Have you had lunch yet", she asks me in her usual upbeat, chipper voice.

"No I haven't. I'm just getting out of a meeting", I say to her as I look down at the bullshit numbers that my team has given me.

"Great, okay so I'm bringing you lunch. We need to talk about mom and dads anniversary party.",She says forcefully, and I roll my eyes at her demanding tone. She always forgets that she's the youngest.

"Shouldn't we wait until we can have Emmett here for that",I push trying to hold out on planning this.

"He's coming when he takes his lunch break. Now go on and tell your bitch of an assistant that you're expecting us for lunch", Alice exclaims. I didn't miss the fact that she said 'us'.

"Mr. Cullen, Miss Cullen, and Miss Swan are here to see you. They say that you're expecting them for lunch. Should I reschedule your meeting with Mr. Frost?",Jessica politely asks and I momentarily freeze.

I'm not prepared to see her right now. It's been awhile since I've had her and I don't think I can make it through lunch without touching her. Having her so close, yet so far. I shake myself away from my thoughts.

"Yes, thank you. Send them in please",I respond, putting my hands in my pockets. If my hands are busy, maybe I'll keep them to myself.

"Also, your father is on the line. I will place him on line 3.", She says and I nod my head in understanding. She walks out the door, and I see line three ring. I pick up the phone.

"Carlisle", I speak. "I know why you're calling", I rub the back of my head and look up watching as Alice and Bella walk into my office. Bella looks perfect as always. Her face seems to glow when she sees that my eyes are on her. She blushes and it momentarily distracts me from my fathers musings.

"Then let's cut to it Edward. You're grandfather wants me to make sure that you're going to handle this merger carefully."My dad pushes.

"Carlisle this is low-risk. There's no way-",I start but he interrupts me.

"Listen Edward, low-risk or not. Your grandfather and I know how you are", He explains, and I nod my head, having heard this speech twice already. "When are you meeting?"

"Some time this week.",I respond to him, looking up. I see the girls pulling out cartons of food. My stomach growls. "I had to reschedule. Something came up"

"Something came up? Edward, this is the best thing for you. You will double in size, and triple in value. Do you understand what that means",Carlisle speaks authoritatively. I don't respond to his rhetorical question. "You'll be a very rich man Edward",He says slowly, and I roll my eyes, because, I'm pretty rich without this Frost guy.

"I understand, Carlisle",I say before we end our call in promise of speaking later in the day.

I rub my hands together walking over to the food on the table. "Thanks for this", I say as Alice hands me a plate. I kiss her cheek, before walking to sit down on the couch across from Bella. We exchange looks as Alice fixes her plate. Bella mouths, 'we need to talk'. I nod agreeing with her. She can talk while I lick her delicious pussy as she grinds it against my face.

I am ridiculously horny, and she keeps crossing and uncrossing her legs letting me know that she feels the same way.

"Ok guys...", Alice says walking over to sit next to Bella, across from me. She looks at Bella, then at me, and I then realize that I was staring. I look away. "Edward, you know Bella right"

I nod. "Of course you do. My memory sucks. You asked her to tutor Mason, so of course you remember her"Alice says to me and I furrow my eyebrows.

"Remember when you asked me...the other day. You said that Mason was having problems in his Reading class.",Bella tries to help me re-call the memory...or maybe this is something she made up, either way I nod my head.

"Oh, yea...right.", I nod, turning my attention back to my food.

Alice directs our attention to mom and dad's anniversary dinner. We toss around ideas which is hard to do with out Emmett here.

Just as the thought enters my brain, Alice's phone rings, and its Emmett telling us that he's downstairs.

Alice excuses herself to go to the bathroom, which gives me the perfect opportunity to grope Bella. I sit next to her, taking her plate from her lap, I place it on the table. I take her hand, which she struggles against.

"Edward...",She trails off breathlessly, trying not to look at me.

Don't pull away from me baby. I pull her hand to my lips and I kiss it. She lets out a shaky breath.

"Can I see you tonight", I beg her. Alice has been home lately so I haven't been able to come over like I usually would. Alice usually spends alot of time at Jaspers house, but since he's on a business trip, she's been home. Unknowingly keeping me away from Bella.

"You know that you can't",She struggles to say. She wants to say yes, I can see it in her eyes. She misses me just as much as I miss her.

"I promise that I will see you tonight",I look her in the eyes, declaring the words. I need her like I need air. The look on her face tells me that she needs me too, eventhough she doesn't utter the words.

I lean forward kissing her lips. I place her open palm on my bulge, and watch as she bites her lip.

I hear the door open, so I let go of Bella's hand. She holds her hand out for me to shake.

"Okay, tutoring starting this weekend? Great", Bella says excitedly, and I nod looking over at Alice and Emmett. Hopefully they don't see my hardon.

Bella Pov

Confession #3: We are liars

Dear Diary,

I think that she knows. Edward's wife knows that he's having an affair, but doesn't know who with.

It doesn't make me feel any less shitty about what we're doing.

God, I love him so much. Who would have thought love this powerful ever existed. It may sound corny, or cliche, but it's true. I never thought that I was capable of holding this much love for one person.

I never felt this way about anyone. In highschool I only dated one guy, Mike, and I did not love him. He was a sweet guy, he got me a job at his dad's store and the rest was history.

But love? I didn't feel that for him.

Edward is my first love, and sadly, he's a married man.

Last week when Edward promised to see me, I didn't think that he would be able to hold up that promise, but he did.

He texted me telling me to come downstairs, so I did, and I saw his car and I hopped in.

He informed me of his plans to get a hotel room, and I got excited. When we get hotel rooms, I usually get him for the whole weekend.

He tells his wife that he's on a business trip and he drives us out of Seattle for our get a way.

When we arrived to the hotel, he recieved a call from his wife. She argued with him, pissed that he left her home with their son, when she was supposed to be going out of town for her friends bachelorette party in Vegas.

She insisted on him hiring a nanny since his parents were out of town for the weekend as well.

I sat their trying not to show how disappointed I was that we have to cancel our weekend.

"We're not canceling Bella. Come with me",He says sitting next to me. He grabs my hand, staring into my eyes.

"To your house",I ask him, and he nods. "That's not very careful, Edward",

He looks down. "I want to spend time with you. I miss you. I love you, Bella. Just please...just come with me",He stands grabbing both of my hands, kissing them. He then pulls me to him, kissing my lips. He pulls back staring me in the eyes.

I nod, and he smiles kissing me again.

We leave the hotel, making our way to his house. Lauren's still there. I see her standing outside on the phone by a car.

She sees us pull up, and she hangs up.

"There you are. Fuck, Edward, I missed my flight thanks to you",She snaps at him, but her eyes shift to me. "Who are you"

"I-I'm uh-",I can't get my words together.

"I told you about Mason's tutor",Edward pipes in.

"Is she a nanny too, because I know that you have that business trip this weekend",she asks and he nods.

"Yea, I just left a few things, and she doesn't have a car, so I had to pick her up",Edward explains.

"Okay, well, my cab is here. I'll be back on Monday",She grabs her two suitcases, strolling them down to the cab.

She didn't even kiss Edward goodbye, or say goodbye to their son. She's a horrible wife and mother in my opinion.

When Laurens out of sight, Edward takes a hold of my hand, walking me into the house.

"Dad, is that you",I hear from upstairs.

"Yeah its me bud, come down here for a second. I want you to meet someone",He walks me to the edge of the steps.

"This is Bella.",Edward introduces.

"Is she your friend",Mason asks and Edward nods. "Cool. Do you play any games", He asks excitedly, and I smile.

"Yeah, of course. What do you have",I ask him.

"We have a wii, and a Xbox",Mason explains.

"I'm pretty good at bowling on Wii.",I tell him.

"Me too. Dad here is only good at golf, which is boring.", Mason rolls his eyes.

"You're just mad because you never beat me",Edward says teasing and I laugh.

Edward's son reminds me so much of him. I barely see any of Lauren's features. He looks just like Edward.

I bonded with Mason the entire weekend, and was still able to have my free time with Edward. It was the perfect weekend. I got to see what it would be like if Lauren wasn't in the picture. Honestly it seems that would be the best thing for everyone in the situation.

Please review! :) Thank you for reading!


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